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One of the joys of our fantastic global communications network called the Internet is the twisted prose that comes out of translation engines. They take the well-chosen words of some hard-working person on the opposite side of the world and turn them into a form of Engrish that is only bit more readable than the original text of Beowulf, but really funny.

Here is some of the translated text from a glowing (I think) recommendation of the Sunbelt Personal Firewall. It was originally written in an alphabet that we’re guessing is in use somewhere between the Persian Gulf and India:

“Now, it is called the Sunbelt Personal Firewall. Not all firewalls are the word-for-word. This firewall was discussed in olden days on my blog. They be analyse in effectiveness. That cannot be stressed adequate.

“The Sunbelt Personal Firewall blocks unwanted movement that is entering – but it also monitors what leaves from your conveyance.

“Outgoing dope may be your hush-hush evidence. It could be that your computer has been compromised and is instantly a district of a bot action. That avoirdupois arrange you up as a schnook of uniqueness swiping. Your computer could be district of a bot spamming action.

“This offers expires on September 17, 2009. A benign firewall, which monitors the communicative movement, intent discharge you an additional maybe at contagious some infection that has occurred on your conveyance.

“The Sunbelt Personal Firewall is extraordinarily a give-away at ten dollars.

“At this cost, the Sunbelt Personal Firewall is affordable to undisturbed unpleasantness strapped students at this period of year. Yes, it is just ten dollars when you using our association and the coupon standards SPFLOCKERGNOME when you categorize your codify.”

Site here.

Just another piece of glowing praise for Sunbelt products from a fan. Thanks Chris.

I mean, could we have made that up?

Just remember: “The Sunbelt Personal Firewall is extraordinarily a give-away at ten dollars.”

Thanks to Stu Sjouwerman

Tom Kelchner